Better

So, the rejection inevitably came.  From Y Combinator.  I was expecting it of course, but as I said last week, I was holding on to a tiny sliver of hope.  And after last week’s post Luck, I thought that even nature was conspiring with me to succeed as a bird defecated on my head.  In the UK (and Russia) that’s a sign of luck.  Not for me it seems.

So this week I’m dealing with rejection.  Not in a particularly dramatic way, more in a pause-for-reflection-what-do-I-need-to-do-differently kind of way; what could they see from my fairly shallow application and can I see it too?

You don’t get a lot of feedback why you haven’t been successful so you have to rely on your own ability and willingness to probe.

Most reasons aren’t helpful of course and I’ve become much better at telling them to Foxtrot Oscar. But some are harder to quieten.  And they’re the ones I’ve known long before submitting the application, the things that keep me up at night; loosely summarised by:

Am I building something people really need?  Will they pay to use it?  Or will they think it’s a bit rubbish?

I’ve spent this last year talking to people who need help getting to know their customer, who want to build with solid foundations, who want to find customers that cost less to acquire because they already want what they offer.  But am I giving them what they want?

The truth is I don’t know. And I won’t know until I get Familiarize into their hands.

It’s still some way off – but I think in my heart I know it isn’t quite what they want.

It’s more complicated, definitely more clunky, and it might even be a switch-off entirely.

Don’t worry I’m not spiralling into some irreversible freefall where I end up killing the business, but I am quite consciously forcing myself to challenge where Familiarize needs to get better.

The rejection I’ve received from an investor isn’t great, but it’s a hundred times better than rejection from a customer – because then I have no business.  And of course I will get rejection from a customer, from many customers, because this is real life.

The point is I feel like I am channelling the good parts of rejection (objective criticism) without internalising the bad points (giving up, sabotage, self-loathing).  As I’ve said before in these posts, a lot of this is because I have built such a strong sense of purpose – I genuinely want to help startups build more customer-led organisations, and if Familiarize isn’t what they want I’ll try something different.

The bad thing about not getting into Y Combinator isn’t anything to do with the money, it’s the fact I’m still on my own.

So again, I’m going to have to pick myself up and find some other ways to get that.  The structure I’m just going to have to build, but I think I can do more on the other two – I think I have become pretty insular of late.

So already I bought myself a terrific book to kickstart a bit of challenge on some topics I’ve not thought much about but need to – how do I sell Familiarize: freemium, free trial, monthly subscription?

And I think I need to push myself out into some networks.  I’ve found a bunch of Software as a Service/SaaS networks of folks like me building product.  So far I’ve been a bit of a taker, lurking and reading what others do.  I think I need to dive in more, get involved, challenge and be challenged.  Maybe I can find people inspired by my mission who might even help or swap time to help one another get better.

My friend John thinks I should be on the hunt for a co-founder too.  He thinks I need a sparring partner, someone who can complement me, someone who demonstrates to an investor that I can attract talent.  Someone who I can demonstrate I can execute with.

So lots to do.  Rejection is a time for reflection, but it’s also a time for action in our quest to get better.  Here’s some ideas for things to try when the world doesn’t quite roll as you’d like:

1.     The first thing is to acknowledge the rejection. I didn’t honestly expect to be accepted, but I am still sad not to have been successful.  It’s stupid to puff up the bravado and will likely slow me getting over it.

2.     Recognise we only get rejected when we are challenging ourselves.  Therefore we have the bar set high.  I started out with the world’s biggest accelerator, one that was handing out almost free money and access to the world’s best founder network.  I should feel proud of trying out for that.

3.     I read a nice thing about how rejection is only a problem in a time of scarcity.  And we’re not in that time.  Focus on abundance – what’s next, what else, what can you do now maybe only because you were rejected?

4.     Write down some things you learned from the rejection, make it count for something.  For me it was the fact I need to make Familiarize better, not because they told me that, but because I looked hard into myself and knew the truth.

5.     A head teacher of one of my children said whenever a pupil says “I’m no good at X” she adds “Yet”.  In most cases there’s always another shot.  The rejection letter encouraged application for the next cohort.  I’m not Y Combinator material yet.

My wife thinks I’ve been flat since I got the email which I guess I have, but I don’t think it’s so much to do with the rejection, as much as what it’s made me think I still need to do to make Familiarize work.

And I know I can.